Transference-Maria Antsupova

Entry 1

            A couple years ago my younger brother, whose name I need not mention here, was seriously ill. When it all started we thought that he just had a fever and he would be fine in a couple days, but it only got worse as the days passed by. We had to take him to a doctor a hundred miles away from our house. It turned out that our brother had paranoia. The doctor explained to us that he was heavily influenced by fear, to the point of irrationality and delusion. Nights were even worse when the moon was full and bright. He could wake up in the middle of the night and start screaming “Stop trying to eat me”.

Entry 2

            I have read that it is fairly normal for everyone to have some degree of paranoia about certain situations in their lives. However, my brother takes it to the extreme, he thinks that other people, including mother, our little sister, and myself, want to harm him, even though we consistently tell him otherwise. It got hard to get along with him and we started arguing with him more often. He used to spend nights and days in his room without talking to us or even eating. When the whole family got together for dinner he was very stubborn and sarcastic around us. One day he even said: So, what’s for dinner tonight? Our neighbors have been looking tasty” I don’t know how to help him, how to save him from this madness.

Entry 3

            We lost track of how many times we tried to help him. Our friends recommended a very good psychologist that has experience in treating this kind of personality disorder, but my brother refused any help from us or anybody else. He is in constant fear that we are all cannibals, and that sooner or later we will try to harm him.

Entry 4

            Today I tried to have an honest conversation with my brother telling him that we are his family and he should trust us. He interrupted me before I finished talking; he took a knife from the kitchen table and told me if I don’t stay away from him he would hurt me. I didn’t have another choice but to leave. I don’t know what happened, but my brother isn’t the man that he used to be.

Entry 5

            It’s been three months since my brother got sick. It’s unbearable to live with him in the same house anymore. He was constantly accusing us of cannibalism. My mother, little sister, and I had a family meeting today and we all decided that it would be better for everybody if we put him in a hospital for long-term psychotherapy.

Entry 6

            Today is the four year anniversary since we put my brother in the hospital. The doctor is saying that he is doing very well and it is possible that in a month we can take him home. O gosh, I missed him so much!

Entry 7

             Yesterday we got a call at 5 am from the hospital saying that my brother escaped to the roof and that we needed to get to the hospital as soon as we can. By the time we got there my brother was dead. He accidentally fell to his death, when security attempted to grab him. I still can’t believe that happened…

Entry 8

            Recently I started to have a feeling that I passionately need to eat raw meat. I always ask nurses to cook my meat raw, and have had no interest in any other type of food. Everybody in the hospital smells like meat to me, so I try to stay away from everyone. My mom comes to visit me once a week. My sister, though, hasn’t visited me yet. Maybe if I invite her for dinner some time, she will accept. I’ll even invite the neighbors—they look tasty.

Descent-Jarrod Clark

I

Perhaps today is the first day of my new life. The first day that I can appreciate my freedom. My freedom, which I did not acquire easily, from that fatal friend of mine that I so foolishly trusted. But that no longer matters. I am back to myself, and I can finally return to my work. Soon, my “friend” will be nothing but a memory.

II

My family is not reacting to my return the way that I wish. They do not want me to return to my work. If they think they can stop me, they’re as insane as I was. My work is incredibly important—not just to myself, but to everyone. Perhaps this is what my new life will be like. No matter, I will continue as I always have; alone.

III

I am beginning to notice people outside my home. They watch me from their windows, their cars, while walking their dogs. Some of them even take notes, I would swear by it. I will continue to record their actions, and act accordingly should I feel that they will be a complication to my work. Tommy, the only member of my family that I still trust, has taken to bringing food and water to me, since I will not leave. This is just as well, since I no longer need to put my work on hold to eat.

IV

Even Tommy has abandoned me. We had an argument over my work- Tommy thinks that I will get sick again. Though he argued that he was worried about my health, I know his true intentions. He means to take my work, as his own. Unfortunately, I no longer have a means to acquire food or water. I must focus harder on my work. Maybe I can find solace in solitude.

V

I have realized my true mistake. I thought that my friend was false. I believed that I could rely on my family to support me, but I was wrong. With my old friends help, I will return to my work.

VI

I am running out.

VII

I have run out. I cannot focus. I realized today that I have not eaten or showered in days. I cannot remember the last time I slept. I must have more. Yet somehow, I know that those people that watch me must have some. Tonight, after dark, I will sneak outside. I will find one of them, and I will take theirs. Tonight, I will regain what I have lost. After tonight, my work can continue.

Don Quixotes Son

To Destruction and Beyond

There was once a boy, he was like any average boy his age. He went to school, was raised by both parents, loved to eat, had a best friend, and absolutely loved to watch movies. His name was Stan. Stan was a pretty intelligent kid, and surprisingly enough his best friend was quite the opposite. His best friend Barry wasn't the brightest bulb of the bunch, but he was a very good friend who would always listen to Stan. One of Stan's favorite things that he always made Barry do was watch movies with him. Stan specifically loved Disney movies such as Finding Nemo, Alice in Wonderland, and Peter Pan, but there was always one that he could watch on repeat everyday all day and that was Toy Story.  Toy Story came out before he was born, but ever since he turned three he never went one day without watching the movie at least once.  Barry went along with it most of the time because Stan was his friend, and he liked hanging out and playing with him whenever they weren't watching movies.  About two years later they were about eight Toy Story 2 came out and Stan was ecstatic. Barry clearly was not as excited and once again just went along with it because Stan was his only best friend. Barry noticed something though, something was different about Stan.  He was always acting like a super hero or at least trying to, but Barry the being person he is didn't think much of it and pretended to play along. They remained friends for quite sometime, proceeded to go to school together, hangout together and of course watch Toy Story together. Although Barry eventually was quite annoyed with Toy Story he just watched it so he would still be friends with Stan. About ten years later something happened that changed both of their lives forever and tested their friendship.  The Toy Story 3 movie was released.

I went to Stan's house today just like I usually do after school, but something felt different today. When I walked into his house he wasn't eating a snack like usual, it was actually quite silent. I wasn't sure if I should just leave, but then I heard a TV turn on so I followed the sound and it was coming from Stan's room. When I got to his room the door was shut. I twisted the knob so that I could peer in because maybe Stan forgot I was coming over and I didn't want to frighten him. When I opened the door I couldn't believe what I was looking at. Stan was watching Toy Story 3 yet again, except this time he was all dressed up. From head to toe Stan was covered in what looked like a "wanna be" Buzz Lightyear costume. He had what looked like a fish bowl on his head, a white suit with a poorly drawn shield on the front, white rubber boots that were clearly painted by him, a waste basket that was assumably his "jet pack", and last but most importantly he had two pieces of cardboard that were suppose to be his wings. I had no idea what to think, let alone what to say.

I called, "Stan? Staaaaannn?"

All of a sudden he turned and looked at me and said, "My name is not Stan, it's Buzz.  Buzz Lightyear."

I'm not going to lie I was a little scared by the dark gleaming look in his eyes because I knew he wasn't joking.  Stan, now Buzz was running all around his room throwing out his arm and pointing it at objects like some laser was suppose to be there destroying objects. 

Randomly Buzz did a somersault towards me and said, "Follow me Barry I'll save you!"

I didn't think much of it so I just went along because he is my friend and he would never steer me wrong.  It was a nice day so initially all of our friends were outside playing around, but once they saw Buzz and how he was dressed and was acting they could not help but burst out with laughter. 

I saw that Buzz was agitated by this but he just smirked and said, "Ah yes the sound of laughter means that everyone is safe and I've done a swell job of keeping it that way."

Buzz was acting like this the whole day and stayed in his "armour" all day, never wanting to take it off even before bed.  I slept over that night because I didn't think leaving him alone was the best idea, but I must have fallen asleep very quickly because I found myself waking up to a loud ruckus.  I thought I was mistaken of what I saw when I opened my eyes, but I blinked a couple times and my eyesight was correct.  There was Buzz tying up what looked like a kid from our school.

Quickly I asked, "Buzz!  What are you doing?!"

He looked at me and said, "He was trying to take my wings and jet pack.  Stupid villain thinking I wouldn't know it was him. Ha!  So do you believe me now?"

"Believe what?" I asked.

"Do you believe I am a superhero or do I need to capture another villain to prove it to you?" He said.

Without hesitation because I did not want him capturing anyone else I said, "Yes! Yes I order you a superhero!"

I did whatever he said because he was my friend and he promised me that if I stood by him through all of his adventures that we would stay friends and go on vacation together.  That day when we went for a walk, and we we were passing by a lemonade stand when Buzz came to an abrupt stop.  I noticed a man at the stand was trying to get his money back because he was unhappy with the way the lemonade tasted.

Buzz butted in and said, "Sir, you should keep walking and leave the girl alone.  Let her keep the money."

The man looked at Buzz very aggravated but simply answered with, "Okay."

Buzz held is head high because he thought he saved the day yet again, but soon after walking away I looked back and I saw the man take his money back.  Meanwhile Buzz was still walking proudly in his "suit" and as we continued our walk more and more people began to stare and laugh at him.  Now Buzz was super offended by this and I could tell because of the look in his eye.  Without hesitation he went after a group of bystanders and began to accuse them of being villains.  He was trying to capture them and tie them up but because I had no idea what to do I just watched.  Buzz was clearly out numbered and before I knew it they all ganged up on him and proceeded to beat him up.  It didn't last long but it was long enough to leave him laying on the ground moaning in pain.   I attended to him after they all left but I had no clue where to go or how to get him up by myself.  I comforted him as best I could, and after a while a neighbor of Buzz's was walking by and noticed that I was on the ground with Buzz.  He came over and I explained what happened, so he helped me get him up and we took him back to his house.

There I told his parents what was going on with him and without any hesitation they became determined to destroy all of his movies.  His parents and I searched for all the movies in his room while he was recovering from his injuries.  Once we found them all his dad took them to the backyard and threw them in the fire pit and started them on fire.  I watched them as they burned, but I also felt like there were another pair of eyes looking too.  I looked next to me and there was Buzz watching as his most prized possession went into flames, and I could see the heat in his eyes.  He must have been too angry to talk because he said nothing to me except give me a "look" to follow him and so I did.  We walked in silence for a couple of miles but then we stopped at one of the tallest hills in town.  I wasn't exactly sure why but I had a feeling that this was not going to end well. 

Buzz turned to me and said, "I think it's time to get out of this town.  No one appreciates the lives I've saved or the deeds I've done to keep this town safe.  I'm leaving."

Before I could stop him or say anything he began to run and right at the peak of the hill he jumped as if he were attempting to fly and shouted, "To infinity and beyond!" 

Those were the last words my best friend spoke because when I reached the top of the hill there was Buzz at the bottom, dead.  I walked down there but it was just so hard to see my friend like that.  His neck was broken.  He was gone.  I couldn't imagine my life without him but from that day on I promised myself I would never watch another movie again.

In The Company of Little Red

                                                      In The Company of Little Red

                                                By Sarah Southwick

        In the woods, I lived as half man, half wolf abiding by the rules that the other wolves have given me. My father was a werewolf who left a human girl he thought he loved at the altar. He returned a year later to check on her but to his surprise, her new husband killed him, and then the girl and her new husband threw his body into the lake. I was born by a werewolf woman my father got with because it was more natural, I guess, to be with another werewolf than a human. She was also killed by a human. I was told humans were killers, just look at what they did to my father and mother!

So I lived with anger in my heart because of it. I lived in the deep darkness of the woods with the other werewolves. We would prey on the humans that would wander into the woods, killing them to get revenge for the pack members they murdered. I always thought, why would my father even want to fall for a human? The thought filled me with anger towards my father.

 I had to go for a run to let go of this anger but suddenly I heard something on a path that many men took to gather wood. No, it didn’t sound like a man at all, rather, a soft pitter patter of footsteps along the forest floor. I moved a little closer and saw a girl. She wasn’t just any girl. She was the most beautiful girl. She had a glowing braid, covered by a red hood that seemed to be attached to a bright red coat. She carried a basket in one hand and let her other hand fall graciously to her side. She was nothing like the ugly men I would see, marching along the path with their axes and musty scent. I tried to get a closer to make out more of her beauty but stepped on a twig which snapped. She stopped and looked around. I could see she pulled out a knife and was prepared to lash out at anything. Her eyes widened as she fearfully observed her surroundings. I stepped out of the shadows and smiled sincerely, hoping she would take my passive greeting. She looked at me with bright blue eyes and smiled back which surprised me.

“Hi,” she greeted me.

“Hi,” I answered back, “where are you headed in this cold day?”

“I am off to see my grandma and bring her the goodies I baked! She lives in the cabin just past these woods.” I paused and looked at her hand still tightly gripping her knife in her red coat pocket.

“Oh I have seen that cabin and it’s still quite a bit of walk. Aren’t you scared of wolves here in these woods?” I asked.

“No, not at all,” she said with a stern voice, “I am prepared!” She pulled out her knife and twirled it in her long fingers. “See?” She said

I chuckled a little knowing that the little 2 inch would merely tickle a wolf.

“What?!” she yelled.

“Oh, nothing,” I said as I stood there, admiring her beauty. I couldn’t believe how beautiful she was and how skewed my vision and thoughts were about humans and their evil ways. We headed towards her grandmother’s cabin and talked and laughed like we were old friends. I offered to carry her basket and she gave it to me with a smile. As the night grew darker, it got colder. I looked at her and saw she was shivering and holding on to her coat tightly.

“Hey, I know a short cut to your grandmas but it requires us getting of this trial for a bit.” She paused and looked at me with weary eyes.

“Oh, no thanks, I was told to never get off the path,” she said.

“But it will take you half the time and the night is only going to get colder.”

“No, I am ok” she answered.

“I can get to your grandma’s faster my way!”  I urged.

“Is that a bet?” she asked.

“Want to make it a game?” I insisted.

“Okay,” she replied.

“What happens if I win?” I asked. “What do I get?”

“A kiss,” she smiled and blushed. My eyes widened and a smile grew on my face. I wondered to myself how it would feel to kiss a beautiful girl like her.

“You’re on!” I said and trailed off. The short cut took me right to the cabin and I looked around fiercely to see if she was there. She was not and I was ecstatic! It was oddly bright around the woods and I looked around to find the light source. I looked up and noticed a full moon.

“Oh no!” I yelled. I could feel my transformation starting. My consciousness started fading. I have not yet learned how to properly control my wolf powers.  

“Who is there,” her grandmother yelled.

“Your granddaughter.” My wolf for answered as I slipped out of consciousness. Now my body is in full control by the wolf.

“Oh come in, my daring” the little old lady said generously. I walked into the old lady’s cabin. She took one look at me and glanced at the basket of her granddaughters. Her eyes widened as she yelled, “you evil wolf, what have you done with her!!!!!”

 My wolf-self was out of control and soon, the old lady became my dinner. I wrapped her bones up in the bed sheets and put them under the bed, I found new sheets to put on the bed, and then I heard a knock at the door. Still in my wolf form, the beautiful girl walked in and saw me. She suddenly turned pale and I thought she was surely going to reach for her knife but I was mistaken. She stared at me, confused, and then finally said “it’s you, isn’t it?”

Hearing her calm voice, I was able to clear my conscience and replied “yes.”

“Where is my grandma…?” I said.

“It’s only us two in the house...” I whispered as the moon fell behind the clouds. My human form came back and I looked at her and she was no longer afraid. She took off her red coat and walked up to me.

“What big arms you have.” She said.

“All the better to hug you with,” I replied with a smile holding her in my arms. She reached up and gave me the kiss she owed me.

“What big teeth you have.” She smiled.

“All the better to eat you with,” I sarcastically remarked. She laughed and I laughed along with her. In the moment I felt what love was and I could see why my father fell in love with a human girl but in my heart, I would never leave this girl like my father did. I was truly happy right here holding her.

The Modern Cyclops: The Troll

Young Otto finally tore his attention away from the latest game on Facebook, Candy Crush.  It’s appeal was amazing.  It was so simple yet addicting with its strategical game play.  He couldn't believe he was able to tear his eyes away from the game to the Facebook menu at the top of the screen.  He attributed his escape by the Facebook notifications that constantly nagged at him.  The soft ping constantly hounded him, and all of the notifications were Pokes from his friends.  He quickly went to his messages and sent one to his friends for dragging him away from the intoxicating experience that was Candy Crush.  He went to his wall and began to examine the constant news of the world around him.  A girl broke up with her boyfriend.  Cartman was bagging on Kyle again.  Fred and Lisa posted pictures from their recent family reunion.  And then Otto found a link posted by Jeremy.  What was it? It seemed to link to a site called “Reddit.”  Jeremy had also posted some text along with the link.  It read, “For those who love humor on the internet!”  Otto was intrigued.  He opened the link in another tab and began to explore.

Otto found many links adorning the new page.  “Pretty much my favorite photoshopped picture of all time.”  “I sent my parents a picture of the sunset in Japan. They sent me a picture 20 minutes later of the sunrise from Florida.”  They were accompanied by pictures next to the links, and Otto found himself entangled in a feeling of adorableness.  He opened both in more new tabs.  He scrolled through the Photoshop link first.  He found himself looking at an adorable penguin with the head changed from that of a penguin to that of an orca.  Otto’s eyes lit up, and he opened his mouth to “awww” at the sight in front of him.  He scrolled down to find responses to the picture.  Many people had the same reaction he had, and others felt to post more pictures and links to other subreddits and pictures.  Otto decided to open some of these links in even more tabs, caught up in fascination with the new site he discovered.

Otto had many tabs opened on Google Chrome.  The only sight on each tab was the favicon for a site showing what sites were open in which tab.  He clicked onto another tab he had opened earlier, one discussing drug use.  He started to read through the subreddit with a grand smile upon his face and his eyes wide open like a child receiving a gift.  As he ran through all of the text, some interesting posts caught his eye.  Crude language was abundant, racist thoughts flying every other sentence.  His smile fell quickly, and his eyes drew together to squint at the screen in thought.  He kept scrolling through the posts, and he began to grow horrified.  Mentions of sex grew the farther he went, and more and more raunchy did it grow.  Mentions of rape were now abundant, almost reminiscent of what one would hear during a Halo match on Xbox Live.  He couldn't bear to keep going through all of the links anymore, he needed to do something about this.

Otto created an account on Reddit.  He would make his own subreddit.  He would draw attention to himself.  He had come across a new creature in his exploration of Reddit, the troll.  The troll would draw attention to itself by the use of language.  Extremely out of place foul language, off topic posts, ignorant and bigoted ranting, and completely off-topic posts were the trolls’ norms.  Otto decided to make a difference and possibly stop some of the trolls.  He would leave after his victory, but he would not let them know who he really was.  He still knew the rule of the internet, never give your actual information to anyone. (Hi social media!)  Otto would become, troll bait.

Otto created a subreddit that he knew would draw attention quickly.  Otto would insult those who belonged to the PC master race.  The subreddit was labeled as “PC master race kisses Consoles’ ass.”  He drew people in quickly.  Many trolls came along to get at him, using many logical fallacies and threats to make him flee, delete his subreddit.  They attacked his character falsely, calling him gay, stupid, having no life, just a 12 year-old who hadn't even hit puberty.  Otto smiled to himself in satisfaction.  He made the trolls indignant, he made them enraged.  The trolls had been trolled.  They were beaten at their own game.

Otto opened a Red Bull to congratulate himself on his victory.  It was his twelfth one that night, for he drank one for every genius idea he had. He became intoxicated with the caffeine and sugar he consumed.  He lost some of the sanity he had kept while going through Reddit.  He looked back at his subreddit, it drew thousands of trolls.  They were all tricked by him.  The trolls got trolled by him, basically a newb.  He decided to make one last post.

“Hahaha!!!  All of you were trolled by the great Otto Dyson!  A newb to Reddit!  Feel shame on you all for this day you were all trolled by me!”

The trolls looked upon the new post in the subreddit.  They became more enraged, they were indignant, outraged!  However, they found the one flaw that Otto had.  The troll bait had posted his actual name.  He gave actual information of himself.  The trolls went to Facebook and searched “Otto Dyson.”  They found the name as one of the first.  This “Otto Dyson” had recently liked Reddit, and he had posted about trolling the people of Reddit.  The trolls went through Otto’s profile and found his cell phone number in his contacts.  The trolls smiled an evil smile.  They were able to contact him constantly, when he was anywhere with his cell phone.  The trolls went back to Reddit and created a subreddit.  It was titled with Otto’s cell phone number.  There was only one post on the thread.  It was an order to the people of Reddit.

“Attack.”

The Silenced

The Silenced

Poem in voice of Medea's two boy children.

She lies without food and gives herself up to suffering.

Wasting-

Away every moment of the day in tears.

A bosom once our very own now filled with hate toward our lineage.

Maternal responsibility vanished and replaced with insanity,

She lays in silence.

Attempted coddled kisses ignite images of warfare,

summon the gods of magic and

over flood the sea's for alls drowning.

She lay-silent.

Our laughter reminiscences thoughts of infidelity.

Stolen love .Intangible intimacy.
Mentions of mistress from afar provides fires presence
disguised in kindness.
Her evil grows-in silence.

As pawns in passion's triangle
we wait.
Holding on to the very being who abandoned our home for rescue
We wait-in silence.

Doom's arrival creeps near
tragedy rains upon our home.
Unsheltered-
we watch-in silence.

Satan's own land servants provide barricades
 at the princesses disposal.
We-are silenced.

There,
In our mothers arms
We are in danger.
Dark cries unheard
we are silent.
Produced from our fathers betrayal
we are-the silenced.

Becoming a Hero

The Odyssey was a tale of a heroic man named Odysseus. Odysseus was no stranger to a challenge; he even had to fight for his hand in marriage. Odysseus married a women named Penelope and they had one child together. Their child was named Telemachus, now a young boy who wants to be a hero just like his father. One day, Odysseus was forced to leave and embark into battle. The Trojan War was a fierce battle in a far away land. Consequently, Telemachus was left to protect Penelope and their home in Ithaca, Greece. Penelope had no idea when Odysseus would return, but kept his memory alive as she told her son of his heroic exploits. This is the story of Telemachus’s journey to one day reunite with his father.

Penelope tells heroic stories to Telemachus (age 6) about his father Odysseus while Telemachus plays in the court yard in Ithaca adorning his father’s clothes. Moreover, Telemachus imagines the time when he will be fighting monsters, battling gods, and sailing across the open sea.

It has been 10 years and there is still no sign of Odysseus. Telemachus’s mother, Penelope, is being fancied by other suitors and Telemachus does not want that to happen. Telemachus is sixteen and he is starting to become proficient at sailing and combat.

Telemachus is now a man and has set out on his first voyage with his crew to find word of his father after 15 years. He has heard that Odysseus may have been seen at the Island of the Cyclops and the course was set. 

Once Telemachus and his crew reached the Island of the Cyclops, they were greeted much like Odysseus. To save his men, Telemachus convinced the Cyclops that he was there to kill Odysseus. Telemachus feared the Cyclops would surely kill them all if he had mentioned Odysseus was his father. Cleverly, Telemachus found out that his father had left this island only a year prior. As an offering of peace, Telemachus and his crew left the island never to return.  However, the Cyclops still sought retribution and before Telemachus could leave, the Cyclops ate ten of his men.

Telemachus decided he needed to get more supplies and men in order to continue the journey to find his father. He and his crew arrived home after one year and Telemachus told his mother of the Cyclops, his men, and the reassuring news of his father.  Penelope was elated to hear that her son and Odysseus were still alive.  She told Telemachus how proud she was of him.  Telemachus was becoming a man right before her eyes.  As the list of suitors continued for Penelope, Telemachus grew annoyed and tired of these men.  He vowed to Penelope to find his father, her husband, and bring him back as the rightful king of Ithaca. Later, Telemachus recieved word of a ship stranded off the coast of Greece. 

After several days at sea, Telemachus and his men found the stranded ship.  They disembarked and searched the nearest island.   Telemachus saw someone in the distance and approached the man. Telemachus asked the man his name and where he was from.  He looked very weathered and hungry, but replied he was from Ithaca. Telemachus asked once again his name. The man replied, I am Odysseus of Ithaca, son of Laertes. Telemachus and his crew were stunned and in disbelief. Telemachus tested the man to ensure he was not lying. He asked the man,” if you are Odysseus what is your son’s name, his mother’s name, and the name of the Cyclops Odysseus defeated”. The man replied,” Telemachus, Penelope, and Polyphemus.” Telemachus decided that this must have been Odysseus, and told him his name. I am your son Telemachus, I searched for you for years and I have finally found you. I have much to tell you. As do I, replied Odysseus.

A Mad Girls Life

 A Mad Girl’s Life

There were three best friends that did everything together. They grew up together, went to the same schools, shared the same teachers and even shared the same boyfriend at one point of time. Kara, Amber and Tori were the girl’s names. One day they came across Bill. He had good looks and was a bad boy which melted all three of their hearts at the same time. Since they all had the hots for him they formed a pack and promised each other they wouldn’t go for him because it wouldn’t be fair. Each of them broke their promises but none of them knew anything about the others relationship until Tori went missing and left behind the most detailed diary any of them ever read. Tori had left behind so many clues for her friends now turned enemies to try and come find her so that she could apologize to them. Although her friends were upset that she broke the pack, unaware that she know they did the same they decided to go find their best friend and reveal their secrets to her. They opened the diary and dove right in. Surprisingly every entry was dated and even had titles for them.

The Very First Day                                                                             June 3^rd, 2013

It was the last day of school and me and my girlfriends were getting ready to start our summer off right. We’d planned to go to the beach everyday if we could and hit on all the hot guys. All of us are virgins and we wanted to find three cute guys that are all friends as well to break our virginities and become our boyfriends. That was our main goal before the summer was over and we started school back it being our senior year in high school. My whole mind changed once we all saw Bill. He was tall, blonde and looked like he had a lot going on. We all had heels over head for him which is why we made a pack and sworn none of us would try to get with him. The type of friends I have, I couldn’t trust for anything no matter how long we’ve been friends. I know eventually there will be a moment where one of us would get our hands on him so I’ve decided that one to be me!

Day Dreaming                                                                                                 June 5^th, 2013

I couldn’t stop thinking about him. He’s been running through my mind since the first time I saw him. I wanted so desperately to tell him how I felt but I couldn’t let the girls find out, they’d never forgive me. I’ve been thinking about a plan to get with Bill, I plan to make him have some type of trust in me and put him in the palm of my hands.

I Got Him                                                                                                       June 10^th, 2013

I finally got my chance. It’s so surreal I don’t even know if I can take it, I didn’t think it would have been so easy. I decided to send him a cheesy little message on Facebook and he replied the next day telling me how he felt the same way and wanted us to talk. I was so happy I couldn’t bare it but I had to hide my excitement from the girls who seemed to be hiding something themselves. Probably was nothing, I was just too happy to even be concerned about that. Myself and Bill decided that we’d keep our seeing each other a secret until we really got serious. We decided to set a date a few days from now and see a movie and hang out to get to know each other. I can’t wait for that day.

A lot Of Dates                                                                                                            June 20^th, 2013

Me and Bill have been on about six dates since the first time we’ve met. They’ve all been amazing and I’ll remember every last one well ever go on. He’s the nicest, sweetest guy I’ve ever met. We hadn’t had sex yet because he says he wants to take things slow with me. I’ve agreed but I am so ready for us to do it and not be a virgin anymore. His eighteenth birthday is tomorrow so hopefully he’s planning to have me then. Since I’m so sure that we will do it I want to go out and buy some nice laundry maybe from Victoria’s secret. It’ll have to be green since that’s his favorite color. It’s so crazy that all of this is happening so fast but I haven’t a lot of time left before I go back to school and I want to start my senior year off right. And speaking of not enough time left, it’s crazy me and my best friends haven’t even hung out since the last day of school. Every time I’m free from Bill they’re out doing something already. It really sucks because I miss them and I and Bill are getting serious and I’m almost ready to tell them.

The Best Day Ever                                                                                          June 21^st, 2013

Today was so wonderful and meaningful to me, words can’t even describe the feeling I feel for Bill. We met at his house and I had already planned I wanted to do something special for his birthday the day before. I lit candles all around his room and made him a nice dinner. We ate our food, talked and laughed about everything and then he took my body in all the ways I imagined him to. I’ve never felt how I felt after tonight, it was amazing. Unfortunately Bill had to end the night early because his family had something else planned which I thought was odd since it was so late but that didn’t matter. After tonight I might be falling in love with Bill and I’m ready to share that with everyone.

It’s Not the Same                                                                                            June 24^th, 2013

Ever since the night me and Bill did it he’s been acting really weird. I told him I was falling in love with him but didn’t say it back. He told me he didn’t feel the same way yet, not even after he took my virginity. I was disappointed he felt that way but it was my job to change that. I decided to hold off on telling the girls just yet after that conversation. I told him I was going to make him fall in love with me.

No Change                                                                                                      June 30^th, 2013

Still since the day we had sex and had that conversation everything is still really strange between me him. All we is have sex and gets up and leave. And when he is here he’s always on his phone and somewhat hiding it from me. I’ve been doing all I could to be a good girlfriend I just want us to work. I know something is going on with him that he is not telling me and I will get to the bottom of it.

I can’t believe it                                                                                                          May 2^nd, 2013

I can’t even explain the hurt I have in my heart right now. Bill has did the ultimate betrayal of all. He actually had the nerve to tell me that he’s been seeing not only Kara but Amber as well. My whole entire heart dropped and I was speechless. He said he couldn’t go on lying anymore, that his heart couldn’t take it. He told me he loved all three of us enough to end his madness and move on. How could somebody ever do something like that? I was astonished. After today I don’t anything will ever be the same.

Goodbye                                                                                                                     May 5^th, 2013

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse. Bill goes to tell me that not only have he been screwing my friends, but screwing them unprotected. We’ve never used condoms since the very first time we had sex. I didn’t think nothing of it because we were together and I thought it was just me and him but evidently I was wrong. Bill has HIV and he has known that he had it from the very beginning. He went on to explain that he saw how vulnerable and desperate me and my friends were and told himself he’d screw us all over just because he knew he could. I couldn’t believe the words he was telling me. I wanted to drop dead right then and there but then again something else came to my mind. I was going to kill this guy that did this to me and my friends even though we all betrayed each other in a way this is not okay to happen to anybody. But I’m leaving this journal for you, Kara and Amber to find so you can know the truth. We may all be HIV positive but Bill is going to die today.

Notebook of a New Kid

It was the first day at a new school. I’m up early as usual. But something is different about today.  I go on with my normal morning routine. I finally get down stairs for breakfast. I ask my mom how I should approach the kids at school? What do I say to them and where will I fit in? She said to me “ it will all work its self out just go and be you”. That was the plan I finished up eating, ran upstairs to get all of my stuff I needed for school that day. When I was ready I told my mom I would see her later on that day. All I hear as I’m running out of he house is “have a good day sweetie” I had a notebook inside my book bag to keep track of how my day goes.

      I.         I didn’t have to wait for the bus very long, the bus pulled up and the bus driver opened the doors and yelled get on the bus and shut up. I figured that was just because he was cranky this morning. As I went to sit with different kids they all just kind of stared at me and watched me like I was some piece of meat. So I minded my own business and went to the back of the bus and sat by my self.

    II.         An other boy approached me when we got off the bus. He introduced him self and said don’t take any offense to people not wanting to sit with you, they see you as the outsider or the lowest person on the food chain. As I walked to my new classroom I could only think to my self what did he mean about food chain.

  III.         My first period class seems nice. My teacher comes off as a very nice and intelligent lady. She introduced her self to the class, as she called roll I started to notice how different kids would react when their name was called upon. I thought to myself how do I make my self look cool so that other kids might talk to me. My name is called and all I can blurt out of my mouth is that’s me. I’ve never had so many eyes on me. They all were just staring at me for a solid minute. Which felt like eternity

   IV.          The hallways were a good place to see how things worked. I slowly walked beside a wall with out lockers to see what these kids do. My observations were cut short when I had to run quickly to my next class

     V.         I’ve made it. It’s finally lunchtime. After a morning of running around avoiding people and trying to not be eaten by all the other kids, I would say I have done a good job so far. I walk into the cafeteria and this place is buzzing with tones of people. It kind of reminds me of the jungle. The table full of jocks seems to be in control of everything they remind me of the lions feeding off of everyone else’s lunches. There was a table for just about every group in school. The higher you were on the food chain the closer you were to the cafeteria food line. Those higher up on the food chain were able to eat first. They had what choice they wanted. It was so embedded into all these kids minds that when I went to go get food everyone stopped and starred at me like I just broke the law. I have started to realize that not many people are going to be very welcoming to the new kid. I know I could figure out somewhere to fit in, but where.

   VI.         After my amazing lunch time experience came the physical education class or how some people like me would call it, jock city class. This is where the strong eat the weak. They strive on their physical abilities to weaken others for later on in the day.

 VII.         Finally the last class of the day, I am almost home free. I can’t wait to get out of here. This new school is to much to handle. I am constantly looking behind my back because I’m scared some one is going to push me or embarrass me in front of the whole school.

VIII.         The bus ride home was quite. I stuck to my self. I avoided all of the animals higher on the food chain. Once the bus driver pulled up to my bus stop, I ran outside of the bus and right home. I did not want to have to deal with anyone else that day. I wanted to go back and look into my notebook and see how I can change things for the next day. 

   IX.         My mom asked me how my first day of school went. I told her it’s like a jungle in there, being the new kid is like being a piece of meat thrown into the lions den. I should be all right I’m going to try my best not to give into this whole concept of social acceptance and just be myself. If there are any other kids who are going to be attending a new school in the future I hope they see these entries from my notebook some way, so that it could help them.

Save the new kids from the jungle